Tough ride home

God has been speaking to me alot about getting things in order and walking in unity.  The walking in unity part has been something David's been hearing alot of lately.

Today, I ended up in night school because Joshua decided to puke all over the daycare's trash can yesterday.  Since they saw it and they have a 24 hour can't come back rule, I needed to stay with him this morning.

On our way home, we were talking about our finances and how to get them in order.  We both understand that we need to be in unity and we need the Holy Spirit to give us a method to handle it.  We were talking about the fact that we both have "hot buttons" with the other one.  Those weren't really the words we used to describe it, but same thing.  For example - I am afraid to approach him on certain subjects because some things just make him shut down and then there's no talking to him.  He is sensitive about certain things because he automatically interprets me as berating him or cutting him down, so he shuts down.  Since we've both been on an ugly end of these situations, there's really no handling it easily.  We both decided and discussed that we just need to understand that we're not in that place now.  Our finances are bigger than either one of our feelings and we need to just handle it.  That was a really good conversation.  Now we just need to get it going, and we will.

Anyways, the tough part...

David has a pet peeve of being interrupted.  It's so hard for me.  I don't intentionally interrupt him.  I never do.  In fact, I try so hard to be careful not to.  Sometimes, though, when we get a good discussion going, I get enthusiastic and it just pops out.  I immediately feel horrible as soon as I hear him just shut down and go silent. 

The hard part was that I just miss Dena so much when that happened.  We never, ever had that problem.  I could just turn off my worries and talk.  I can't do that with David.  David is literally my absolute favorite person to talk to, but I can't just talk without having to filter every single word that comes out of my mouth.  This is probably selfish, but it hurts that he can't just try to understand that and meet me in the middle.